Friday, September 8, 2023, 20:37
There I was, somewhere along Fossil Creek, in the Land of Tomorrow, also known as Kentucky, along with a dozen strangers, preparing to embark on my first ayahuasca journey. Feel free to judge me, I was not the only Christian in the room. I did not make this decision because I was excited about the high, in fact ayahuasca does not get you “high”. After a considerable amount of research I came to the conclusion, after having been called a “healer” by several other shaman, preachers, psychic and the like; that I wanted to come to God as cleanly and purely as possible. I wanted to be made whole in order to serve. I feel God led me to this medicine, God Created plants to aid in our healing, He Allowed this plant medicine to help me in some way, though I would only understand how I was being healed years later.
**I would only recommend this experience to those who understand that principle; God creates all things with a purpose.
Before one takes this medicine, a considerable amount of body prep must be done in the days before the ceremony. No smoking, no drinking, no drugs, no sex, no foods with excessive vinegar, a vegetarian diet or liquid fast for 3 days to 1 week prior to the journey.
So there I was, nervous, but ready to drink the tea. We lined up, one-by-one, we faced the shaman who sized up each person individually, giving them the dose he felt they needed. For me it was about .25oz, or one quarter of a standard shot glass. The medicine was served three days in a row, after the sun went down.
I drank my serving and handed my cup back to the shaman and went to sit on my yoga mat as we began to sing Peruvian spirituals, waiting for the medicine to take effect. For most you will begin to vomit and/or have violent bowel movements, and/or cry uncontrollably. The things that come out of you do not correlate with what you had to eat, at all. The native protectors of this medicine believe this is the process of expelling “demons” or whatever darkness you may have come to eliminate.
I made it through this process, and laid down with a blanket as I got inexplicably cold, my second experience I got inexplicably hot. I would later learn the active component in ayahuasca that brings about the “hallucinations” is called DMT or dimenthyltriptamine, better known as the death molecule. DMT is released from the brain, in a small amount, to induce sleep at night, and is also released in a larger amount at the moment of one’s death. To embark on a journey such as this, one is essentially embarking on a self-induced, near-death experience. Had it been explained to me this way before I went, I may have reconsidered. The extremes in temperature are both things that can happen to a person prior to one’s death, the death chill, or the death fever.
I fought the medicine for about an hour as I could feel it traveling along every neural pathway in my brain, I was praying for gentleness, I don’t like feeling high. At last I heard God’s Voice, “Let go, I got you.” I remember very little after that except sliding down a giant spiral slide which appeared to be a screen, or a roll of film, on which was every moment of my life, past present and future, including my yet to be conceived son’s, baby shower. I didn’t want to see, I shook it off.
I remember experiencing the events of my divorce, for me it was hard to believe that could be real considering my husband was laying right next to me. It was real.
I kept hearing bells, and feeling “people” walk around and over me as they whispered, “She’s the mother, she’s the mother,” when I would sit up and open my eyes, everyone would be laying in their own corner of the room, having their own journey. At the end of the ceremony, I was the only one still curled up in their blanket, I could hear everything going on around me, in fact the things the others were saying, came to me, moments before they said it, but I couldn’t escape my own journey. I felt the utmost love and comfort, as if being held by a mother, something I had never felt.
Any good shaman who serves ayahuasca should tell you that it can take several months, even years to process your journey and to remain open to the healing. I can honestly tell you that I am still processing, 4 years later.
One month later I decided to embark on my second and final ayahausca journey, this time with a more genuine shaman, Maestro. I set a more clear intention as I knew what to expect, I went with the hopes of learning more about language…
The beginning of the experience was the same as above. This time I was more receptive to the effects of the medicine and didn’t fight as hard. All I remember is waiting for God at the edge of a forest trail. Finally I heard this booming, grandiose voice, I looked around and saw no one. The Voice Said, “Down here.” I looked down, it was a gnat, yes, a tiny little gnat, He Said, “Come on, let’s take a walk.”
A friend would later share with me that a man named Carlos Castaneda had a similar experience with ayahuasca and God Presenting Himself as a gnat! I found it to be confirming. Consider what Jesus said in Matthew 18:16 regarding witnesses. I believe if two or more people share a similar experience there must be a shred of truth to it.
Flash forward to me sitting and writing in my journal, processing my previous journeys, now pregnant with my fourth child and only son, when I heard again that booming voice I had heard during my second ayahuasca journey. He Said, “Che-Chee-o-Wahk.” He Said this to me over and over and over, until finally I wrote it down on a white board in our garage.
I knew it was important and began immediately trying to uncover what it could it mean. At the time, in my limited linguistic skills, the best meaning I could derive was ‘cow-dancer’ or ‘moon-dancer’. The language is Indian, and by Indian I mean Native American. However, I discovered that most Indian languages today are very broken, some no longer exist, this particular language was protected by one , aging, Indian with only a few hundred surviving words. I gave up, but the words never left my mind, every few months I would come back to that and try again to find out more.
Lo and behold, sometime at the end of April 2023, I busted the mystery! God Called me the Linguist and suddenly I knew what I needed to do, pray. “God, show me the way.” I prayed this simple prayer, and Holy Moses did He ever. “Che-Chee-o-Wahk.” It means two things; “Hey old friend.” Chills rose up my spine as I felt suddenly so connected to my purpose, and amazed by God; and “Let’s take a walk.” As in something you would say to an old friend after not seeing them for a while. I tear up every time I see those words “Che-Chee-o-Wahk.” I don’t know about y’all but this blew my mind…
Hidden within that phrase is an ancient syntax argument, ‘Che-Chee’, regarding the placement of feminine and masculine pronouns in regards to two or more people, i.e., them. It is essentially akin to ‘What came first, the chicken or the egg?’ I’m not sure about other biblical linguists, but this argument drives me insane, truly.
Here’s the trick to help you remember, God Himself Puts His Wife First. ‘Che-Chee’ is ‘She-He’.
That’s all for now.
Don’t forget to wash your hands!
Talk soon.